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September 23rd, 2010

darknessdance: (Default)
Thursday, September 23rd, 2010 02:08 am
I am on what seems to be some kind of space ship. It is filled with strange, tall silent creatures-aliens. The light is a murky sort of dirty yellow, and fills the space within the ship without seeming to come from any one source.

There has been an argument going on, quiet fighting and disagreement of some sort. The ship is filled with tension. I am being held by the strange creatures, my arms behind my back as they force me to look through a rather large longish window by two of the alien’s creatures. There are tall large square blocks of instruments framing both sides of this window, with the ceiling forming the top. The row of instruments on the right seems to go on further than the ones on the left, and than tapers off further on. The light also seems to be brighter on the right, and the left side is dimmer to almost dark…

The window in front of me that I am being forced to look out, and it does seem to be a window and not a viewing screen, the window is rather large I could step inside it, but it sits low to the floor and seems to slant outward and down from the walls. It is not on the same angle as the instruments on either side of it. I don’t seem to be looking out of it so much as looking down through it, and the creatures force my head downwards as to be on the same angle with it. It seems to be on an almost 45% angle.

The window looks down into space. In the window out in space is a planet, it takes up most of the viewing space of the window. Its ether very large or we are really close to it. I think there are other space ships around the planet as I catch glimmers of light off metal in the starlight. I feel completely confused and bewildered.

Suddenly the planet seems to explode from within without warning. It explodes in a fiery ball of yellow, white and red flame, and is gone. The tall, silent alien creatures have done it though I do not know why or how I know this. I feel great horror, disbelieve and confusion as the planet is destroyed. And the fact that it is all so silently, no noise, no nothing, makes it somehow seem even more horrifying.

The creatures release me; I turn stunned and terrified to my right to see my brother standing there. He is tall, blond and young and also being held by two other of the large (they must easily be between seven and eight feet tall). He is straining against their hold, struggling, screaming and crying, trying to pull loose from their hold… He is calling me a traitor, screaming it’s all my fault the planet is gone and our people are dead. I am confused, disbelieving. He has gone quite mad with grief. Did I do it, am I the cause??? If I did, than why am I so confused?? I don’t think I am guilty of this crime, it doesn’t feel so. But I am numb and in shock from the double loss of my people and my world, and my brothers madness added to that.

Was there a plan that I was somehow a part of that backfired miserable????

The scene replays over and over throughout Jr. High and most of High School. All the time I was living in Washington. Certain people seem to bring it on, they were the ones who also seem to see this scene too, however from a different perspective. They also seem to know much more about what was happening in what I saw than I had actually told them.

I think part of my confusion during the vision is the knowledge somewhere deep inside me that the planet destroyed was NOT earth, and the only brother I had was only two at the time this started, and was neither tall nor blond. I never really got any answers and wonder still what it all meant and why it kept repeating its self.